Dear Cora,
It's hard to start writing this without getting emotional. Honestly, it's been hard to think about writing this without getting emotional.
I've been writing emails to you for over 18 months now, but this will be the toughest one I'll ever write.
It occurred to me recently that the whole world knows what I'm dealing with, but you and Louise don't. On the one hand, that seems extremely unfair, but on the other hand, I'm fairly sure that my heart will break in two whenever I attempt to give you my news. Perhaps that's the reason I've avoided the conversation. Or maybe it's because I really don't think you'll be able to comprehend the phrase, "Daddy is sick," right now.
In a way, you could argue that it is deceptive of me to keep that news from you, and you'd be right. I would counter that it's just my desire to keep things normal for as long as I can. The condition I have won't allow things to be normal for anywhere near as long as I want...so I guess I'm just doing what I can to keep on having pillow fights, keep playing in the tree house, keep watching movies together, keep making dinner together, keep painting pictures together...just keep on keepin' on. Given my motives, I hope you'll forgive the deception.
ALS gives me so many excuses to become the proverbial floundering ship in a storm, but you, Louise, and your Mum give me the reason to grab the helm and sail.
I love you with all my heart.
Tony... this is one i wish i had not read :( It breaks my heart, my love to you keep strong.
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ReplyDeleteYou're a wonderful Father, Tony. Your daughters are very lucky.
ReplyDeleteGood lad Tony, a wise course of action. There will be time enough to talk about sickness when it is too obvious to ignore. In the mean time just keep packing in the fun and the positive childhood memories will rack up.
ReplyDeleteCRYING!!! I was told by someone today how touching it was going to be to read this.... It tugged at my heart strings. You are sooooo brave and very brilliant to write these words. I know we have spent so much time joking over the years, but I am taken by your sensitivity every time I read your posts. Amanda, Cora and Louise are very lucky girls to have such an incredible role model!
ReplyDeleteLove you Coach.
ReplyDeleteI was planning to write almost exactly what stevemof did, so I'll just say ditto. You're a good man and a great father, Tony.
ReplyDeleteTear jerker but how brave and courageous to show your love and emotion for your little girls. Only shows what a great Daddy you are and what a big heart you have for your family. Cherish those precious times! Continuing to pray for a miracle. More pillow fights are good!
ReplyDeleteYou will know in your heart when the time is right. Your course of action (having fun!) sounds like a great plan. Love, Steph
ReplyDeleteI think of you as the guy who can always make me laugh, but I see you can make me cry, too. I agree that they don't need to know now. Hopefully they won't need to know for a long, long time. Have fun, take lots of pictures.
ReplyDeleteTony my heart goes out to you. I just read this today and what can I say that has not already been said. You are one awesome guy stay strong.
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